It’s possible that your partner is clear about what he wants, in which case moving in may only prolong the inevitable, where he rejects marriage again
Illustration/Uday Mohite
My boyfriend hurt me a lot and it got to a place where I was almost ready to end our relationship. He apologised and asked me to take him back, and I eventually did but that act has been bothering me a lot. We have been dating for a year, and this was the first time I saw a side of him that shook me. How can I forgive him for hurting me in this manner? He acknowledges that he was wrong, but I have changed the way I look at him since the incident and don’t know if I can ever get back to loving him the way I used to. The more I think about it, the harder it is to stay committed to this relationship. Should I end it under the assumption that things will never go back to the way they were?
It’s normal for relationships to change, not always for the better, when one begins to understand one’s partner better. It’s a natural form of evolution because it is only by spending more time with another person that one can figure out if the relationship is moving towards a direction that works. If you believe this is someone who is not compatible with you, the argument is a lesson. It may be too soon to assume this isn’t working out, although you are the only person qualified to take that call. If your feelings towards him don’t change in the near future, and you believe there is no way to rekindle what you had, ending this may be your only option. Wait and watch for a while, until you believe you can’t.
How do I tell if my partner really doesn’t want to get married, or if he is saying it because he just doesn’t understand what it will be like? Should I move in with him?
It’s possible that your partner is clear about what he wants, in which case moving in may only prolong the inevitable, where he rejects marriage again.
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