I don’t know what to do because I love him very much and believe we are very good together
Illustration/Uday Mohite
I am a 23-year old woman and have been in a relationship with a guy my age for two years. Lately, it has started to feel as if I am losing him. He doesn’t try and meet me if I don’t initiate it, doesn’t ask how I’m doing when we are on a date, and doesn’t even chat with me much on WhatsApp unless I start a conversation. It feels forced, as if I am making him stay in this relationship against his wishes. I have tried asking him if everything is okay and he says it is, but I can sense that his heart is not in this. I don’t know what to do because I love him very much and believe we are very good together. What can I do to try and make things go back to the way they were?
You can try going on a holiday with him and have a conversation away from other distractions. If this feels forced, you can also stay away for a while and give him time and space to understand what this relationship means to him. It’s possible that he has other things on his mind that he isn’t comfortable talking about, and it is sometimes good to maintain distance until there is a certain amount of clarity. If he chooses to stay away without you initiating a meeting, it will also become obvious that he isn’t interested in making this work. You may love him and want this to go back to how things were, but a successful relationship involves two people pulling together in the same direction. Without that, nothing you do or say will make any difference.
My relationship with my girlfriend has changed since she got a high-paying job. I don’t know why she doesn’t treat me the way she used to. What should I do to fix this?
You can tell her how you feel and why this is a problem and give her a chance to see things from your perspective.
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