I am wondering if he loves me at all...

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I feel very unloved in my relationship with my boyfriend. I am 24 years old and he is around 27. We have been together for over a year, but I always feel lonely even when he is around. We go on dates, chat about our lives, but he never really engages with me in any meaningful way. I sometimes feel as if he is with me for the sake of it because he needs a girlfriend to go out with. How do I try and get closer to him, or find out if this is something, he isn't serious about?
To feel lonely in a relationship is a sign that your partner isn't valuing you as much as you would like. It indicates a lack of attention or respect, and you are well within your rights to call out his behaviour. The two of you have been together long enough to be able to have this conversation. If you feel as if you can't, that is another sign that there are problems. Tell him how you feel, be as honest as possible, and give him a chance to do what needs to be done if he wants to save this relationship. If he doesn't make that effort, you will have a pretty good inkling of what the future holds.

My wife has been out of a job for almost five years, and this has put an unhealthy stress on my shoulders. She doesn't even try looking for something now, because she has grown used to the idea of staying home while I provide for our family. I am afraid of how this will damage our marriage but am also worried about saying anything to her because she doesn't like this conversation and we will end up fighting. What should I do?
Is the risk of a fight more worrying than the future of your relationship? If this upsets you today, the resentment you feel will only increase in the coming years. The sooner you speak up, the better.

The inbox is now open to take your most carnal and amorous queries. Send your questions on email to lovedoc@mid-day.com

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