'He buys me coffee. What does he want?'

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I have been working at an office for a little over a year and have a co-worker who often buys me coffee at least once a week. I thought this was just a welcoming gesture at first, but it now seems a little strange because I am the only woman he does this for. I don't know if it means he has any feelings for me, and I don't want to read too much into this, but it is becoming a little awkward because I can't keep accepting his coffee. Should I confront him and ask him why he does this? I don't know if he will think of me as rude, so I hesitate. Does he want to be my friend or is he looking for something else?
If you are the only person he buys coffee for, it's obvious that he is more interested in you than in his other colleagues. A welcoming gesture won't continue for a year. If the coffee makes you uncomfortable, you can simply ask him to stop, as politely as possible. If it doesn't bother you, I suggest you try and engage him in conversation, or simply ask him out for coffee instead to try and get to know him better. Think about your own interest in this person, and what you hope this endless coffee run implies. If you would like to be friends, make that clear. This can only be awkward if the two of you refrain from being open and honest about your expectations from each other.

My ex-boyfriend has not managed to get over me, and I don't think I have moved on either. He is with someone else though. What should we do?
Neither of you can do anything until he specifically tells you how he feels and has a conversation with the person he is dating. Until that happens, you are simply his ex-girlfriend. You can always tell him how you feel, of course, but there is a third person involved.

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