Don’t really like who he is...

21 March,2025 07:44 AM IST |  Mumbai  |  Dr Love

There is no manual that says two people ought to feel something for each other only after they have met for a prescribed period of time
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Illustration/Uday Mohite


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I matched with a guy online and we have been chatting for a few weeks but, the more I get to know him, the more I believe this will be a mistake. He seems to think the opposite is true and wants to meet in person. I don't want to bother, but part of me feels as if not meeting him will make him feel that I have been leading him on. Another part of me wonders if meeting him and then ending this will only make this situation worse for both of us. I have been delaying a date for days and he keeps asking me out regularly. What should I do? I don't want to just block him because that seems unnecessarily cruel.
You're overthinking this. Online dating, like dating offline, operates under the premise that anyone can walk away if it isn't working. You are both adults, and he is presumably aware that neither of you are obligated to go on a date if you don't want to. You're not in a relationship and worrying about how he might react is not an issue given that you are being upfront about how you feel. You are both entitled to your feelings, and both allowed to decide if you want to meet or not. Meeting him only to tell him that this won't work is a waste of time for both of you, and you will be doing him a favour by being honest now, rather than later.

Is it too soon to find love with someone after just three dates? I think I have found it but it's only because this has happened so quickly that I have my doubts. How will I know if this is real?
There is no manual that says two people ought to feel something for each other only after they have met for a prescribed period of time. Feelings matter and you should welcome them. They may also change at some point in the future, so trust your instinct.

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