You can try listening to him and not worry about policing his girlfriend. If he trusts her, that is all that counts
Illustration/Uday Mohite
I am a 28-year old man and have been dating a girl my age for about two years now. We have known each other since college and started out as friends before getting into a relationship. I get the feeling that she wants us to make a long-term commitment because she wants to be married by 30. I love her a lot and don’t have a problem with getting engaged, but I also worry that we are doing this only because she is starting to panic about being single when she hits that particular milestone. I have no problems being 30 and single because I don’t have a fixed age by which I want to be married. Should I tell her to wait and risk ending this relationship, or get engaged just because it will make her feel secure?
You haven’t said anything about your own feelings, which should matter more than everything else. How do you feel about spending the rest of your life with this woman? Does the possibility of her not being with you make you upset? If you are choosing to get engaged just to make her happy, or only because you don’t want to risk the possibility of her breaking up with you, aren’t you doing yourself as well as her a disservice? It may make sense for you to try and find answers to some of these questions before you arrive at any decision.
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My best friend’s girlfriend always flirts with other guys when he’s not around. I have told him this repeatedly, but he says he trusts her and is okay with it because that is just her nature. I don’t know how I can convince him that this isn’t the right thing for her to do. It’s causing some tension between him and me because he thinks I am trying to control his life. What should I do?
You can try listening to him and not worry about policing his girlfriend. If he trusts her, that is all that counts.
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