How do I convince her to do this?
Illustration/Uday Mohite
I have been dating a girl who claims to love me but doesn’t want to commit to a long-term relationship. She says we should take it slow and is not sure she wants to be with me for too long. Her reasons are not sensible because she keeps saying it’s about trying different things in life and not sticking to just one path or person. I don’t get it because it’s obvious that we have strong feelings for each other. If there’s nothing wrong with a relationship, why ruin it by wanting to be with someone else in the future? I understand that she wants an interesting life, but we can always have one by being together. How do I convince her to do this?
You don’t have to convince her of anything. The two of you have been clear about what you are both looking for, and it is only a matter of time when one or both of you will have to take a call on what happens next. If your relationship is strong, focus on maintaining that and work on making it better. If she feels that this isn’t enough, she may decide to move on. Either way, it is only actions that can change the way one feels about a relationship, and every bond evolves with time. She may change her mind about this a few months from now, and it is possible that you may too. For now, it’s obvious that you are both not on the same page yet, so it is best to simply take things at they come and enjoy the fact that you have each other.
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My boyfriend wants me to stop speaking to someone who can help me with my career. What do I do?
You are an adult and are capable of making up your mind based upon what his reasons are, what you think for yourself, and how you think this person can harm or help you in any way. Keep discussing it with your boyfriend.
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