It’s impossible to assume what the future holds, or what someone thinks of you, without putting yourself out there and asking
Illustration/Uday Mohite
How do I know if I have a realistic chance at getting into a relationship with someone? I have been having flirtatious conversations with this person, and I know she is interested in me to a certain extent because she replies to my messages quickly. It’s just hard to understand if this is just casual conversation or if she reciprocates my feelings for her. I know she will agree to go out if I ask her, and the only reason I haven’t is because I want to make sure this will go somewhere. If it doesn’t, it will break my heart and I would rather not try. It’s better for me to assume this isn’t happening than to put myself through something that will cause me pain. How do I find out what she wants?
You want to experience something without putting in the work. It’s like saying you want to watch a movie about rock-climbing rather than attempting to climb yourself. Why not put yourself in her shoes and see this from her perspective? How is she supposed to gauge her feelings for you without being given an opportunity to find out what you’re like? If it doesn’t work, that’s life. If it does, it will be because you both decide to give it a chance and do what it takes. It’s impossible to assume what the future holds, or what someone thinks of you, without putting yourself out there and asking.
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My boyfriend is unkind to me, which hurts because I went against my family to be with him. I gave up a lot and, the minute I committed to him, he changed and began treating me badly. I don’t know what to do. Please help.
Nothing can justify someone treating you badly, irrespective of what reasons they may claim to have. If this relationship is not working and you feel disrespected, accept that it has failed and consider moving on.]
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