Marriage is about equals and it is only by treating each other with the respect you expect that this can work for the better. The sooner he understands this, the easier it will be for you both
Illustration/Uday Mohite
I am a 29-year old woman and am engaged to a guy six years older. We met at a family gathering and our families knew each other so it was easy for us to date and move towards marriage. It all happened very quickly because his family was keen that he settle down given his age. I was also okay with it because I had given up on finding someone using online dating apps. Since the engagement, however, my fiancé has begun to act as if he is a father figure to me. He gives me a lot of unwanted advice, questions all my decisions, and is also keen on meeting all my friends so he can comment on who is nice and who isn’t someone I should associate with. This is worrying me a little because I don’t want to play the role of younger, silent partner just because he is older. If this sets the tone for our marriage, I am concerned. How do I resolve it?
Age doesn’t have anything to do with mansplaining, as you may have figured out by now. This is a question of communication, more than anything else, and the engagement period is perfect because it allows you to get a better idea of your partner, your individual approaches to this relationship, and what you both expect from the other person. If you have concerns, and they seem valid in this instance, you should bring it up and discuss it with him. Marriage is about equals and it is only by treating each other with the respect you expect that this can work for the better. The sooner he understands this, the easier it will be for you both.
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My girlfriend wants me to go out with her friends whenever they meet, but I am almost always the only boyfriend there. How do I get out of doing this?
I’m not sure what the problem is. If you don’t want to go somewhere, what stops you from simply refusing?
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