Glossary of terms for politics/elections

Once upon Dear reader, Lok Sabha 2019 beckons, and the media is full of phrases, terms and expressions, which are going bumper over your head, right? Rahul Da Cunha simplifies some of them for you

 Once upon Dear reader, Lok Sabha 2019 beckons, and the media is full of phrases, terms and expressions, which are going bumper over your head, right? Let me simplify some of them for you.

1. EVM: At one level this is simply a machine, an Electronic Voting Machine, right? Wrong. Arundhati Roy and Arnab define it as Every Vote Matters. Some other definitions, Eerie Vicious Mantris, Eloquently Vocal Misogynists, or Everything Vs Modi: Modi bashers blame the PM for everything. "It's raining in Jan. Global warming? No, Modi's fault." "My car broke down. Faulty carburettor? No, Modi's fault."

2. Feku Pappu Mitron Acche Din: You've also heard these words and wondered what they mean, correct? Me, too.

3. DiDi Di DaDa Da: 'DiDi Di DaDa Da Is all I want to say to you They are all meaningless And I'm all that's true' This song is the No. 1 hit across West Bengal. I'm no soothsayer, but it has the melody and power to become a rage across the country.

4. Wayanad: This is a new millennial phrase, Why and odd. This is how it can be used in a sentence. "Is it me or is Jinchak uncle's friend, you know, thoda sa, off? "No man, he's just wayanad."

5. UUP: This is an adjective that used to be AAP. The long form now is Uhm Uhm Pass. So, it refers to something that had potential and fell by the wayside, big time. An example: "How's Babloo doing as a musician?" "Badly, he had that one hit, Jakaas Chakaas, and sadly he's become a UUP." (Please, dear reader, UUP is not to be confused with the noun UP, which is defined as a state of anarchy.)

6. Hema Matondkared: Literally it means: from selling water purifiers to crop harvesting. The other, more symbolic meaning of Hema Matondkared means to be picked from one skill set and be expected to perform in another. "Cheeku was doing fine as head of sales till they made him CEO. What a Hema Matondkared."

7. Bhakt: This is a Hindi word that draws its roots from the English word 'bark'. It's use in a sentence: "His bhakt is much worse than his bite."

8. Pre Anka Vad Ra? This is a complicated series of half words. Say, when a sister wishes to scold both an errant husband and an erring brother simultaneously. The husband is trying to rob a bank and the brother is attempting to swallow his nursery rhyme book, she will scream, "Vad Ra? What are you both doing? Now stop it."

9. DeMo: So, all you oldies out there, this is how rappers and the hip-hoppers refer to our PM. "He's de man, DeMo." It's also how they refer to being broke. "Hey man, I'm fully DeMo, can't pay de rent."

10. Finally there is one phrase you do know, dear reader: caught between the devil and the deep blue sea.

See you April 10. Or, not.

Rahul daCunha is an adman, theatre director/playwright, photographer and traveller. Reach him at rahuldacunha62@gmail.com

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