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Mid-day 44th anniversary special: ‘I learnt to run my own house’

Updated on: 28 July,2023 09:04 AM IST  |  Mumbai
Vinod Kumar Menon | vinodm@mid-day.com

Ayesha sehgal | NGO worker | For Ayesha Sehgal, the move from a pampered, protected life in Delhi to Mumbai was a journey to being confident and independent

Mid-day 44th anniversary special: ‘I learnt to run my own house’

Ayesha and Saurabh Sehgal at home in Andheri West. Pic/Ashish Raje

Ayesha, 34, and Saurabh Sehgal, 36, migrated to Mumbai from Greater Kailash, South Delhi during the pandemic in March 2021. Saurabh got a job opportunity in the city and Mumbai has been their home for past two and half years. Ayesha works at a well-known NGO. The couple is looking forward to next month, when they will be blessed with their first child.


Here’s Ayesha’s account of moving to Mumbai, growing as a person and successfully making a home and a life here amid the pandemic: 



Born and brought up in Delhi, and the younger of two siblings, I have always been in a very safe environment. I am a typical south Delhi girl whose life was within a 10 kms radius of her house. I even got married within a 5 kms radius! Night outs, late night dinners with friends were never my thing…My mom has been my best friend.


Post marriage we had a typical joint family set up in GK2 (Greater Kailash-Part II), one of the so called “posh areas” of South Delhi. I never entered the kitchen unless I had to open the refrigerator! My mom and mother-in-law were competing on who pampers me more.

Saurabh was working in the paints and coatings industry and I was in the broadcast industry when in 2021 he got a job opportunity in Mumbai. His concern about whether this was worth giving up on 10 years of my career and how I would adjust and manage on my own kept him from taking the opportunity, which would have given him a career boost. We spent days and nights discussing it and finally decided to take a leap of faith and moved to Mumbai - a city we weren’t very sure of.

On February 26, 2021, Saurabh came to Mumbai a month before I did so he could figure out a house. We used to talk often on video calls when he would be house hunting—I rejected all the houses. We eventually found a decent place to move in. It took me a very long time to comprehend that we were residing in one of Mumbai’s prime neighbourhoods with some of the city’s finest views.

On March 29, 2021, right in the middle of the pandemic, I came to Mumbai. A “not so big” house, with hardly any space to have a 24 hours help. We had to make peace with finding different maids for different household chores. Whoever said it’s easy to get a “bai” in Mumbai definitely lives in some different era altogether. They are difficult to find, they charge a bomb and they have their tantrums. Settling down took some time with no mom to handle the maids and no dad to take care of groceries and no “house handling” experi ence of any kind whatsoever.

There was even a time in between when COVID cases increased in Mumbai during the second wave and the society didn’t allow domestic helps and delivery boys in. But Saurabh always had my back whether it was helping in the kitchen or with household work.

Soon enough we realised that Mumbai has a lot of positive sides  also. The city makes you feel comfortable, people step up to help. One thing which made us comfortable is that Mumbai is a very non-judgmental city. Your appearance doesn’t have to relate to how much money you have in your pocket. I remember attending our first house party all decked up only to find people in their PJs. In my defence, it was supposed to be a birthday party and hence the dressing up.

I learnt to run my own house too. From not moving to getting even a glass of water for myself, here I was, getting the electricity and plumbing work done at our house, alone. People would be swarming the house for all kinds of work. Somehow, I could trust them and it never felt unsafe. This was a huge turning point as it made me much more confident and independent.

New career break

This city has been good to us. Saurabh is doing well in his organisation. I eventually switched to the social service sector and started working for a child rights NGO. I can contribute directly towards the welfare of marginalized children of the society - it’s a job I always thought of getting into but was too caught up in the rat race to have the courage to step out. While Saurabh’s office was in Lower Parel and mine in Malad, we had opted for this area where we stay so that I was closer to my office, after having travelled long distances in Delhi every day. However, things were back to square one with my new office closer to Lower Parel as well and hence started the long commutes again. Thankfully, we travel together and it gave us an opportunity to have many more dinner dates, especially during the week.

Saurabh and I have gone through a lot of ups and downs in the past 2.5 years of living alone but being together made it easier. We are now gearing up to welcome our first born next month. 

No city or its way of life can make up for not having your friends and family around. But Mumbai is kind enough to give you time to adjust to it.

Mumbai meri jaan?

Love about Mumbai Cosmopolitan culture - the city is a melting pot of cultures and people from different backgrounds, multiple cuisines, languages and traditions.

Hate about Mumbai Traffic and the city’s poorly planned constructions and renovation.

Expectations from Mumbai Fast paced lifestyle - The city has a busy lifestyle which is vibrant and dynamic.

Did Mumbai live up to it? Yes.

Will it remain forever home? Never say Never.

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