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My girlfriend gets angry very quickly and quite often...

Updated on: 23 May,2011 08:44 AM IST  | 
Diana |

My girlfriend and I have been going out for over a year and a half. Our relationship started off great, but now it's been really rocky for a while

My girlfriend gets angry very quickly and quite often...

Dear Diana,
My girlfriend and I have been going out for over a year and a half. Our relationship started off great, but now it's been really rocky for a while. She gets angry, very easily and very frequently which then causes fights. She always chalks it up to being tired or stressed out from work. When she starts to yell or get angry, she says that she's "venting." I have no problem listening, but her "venting" is borderline abusive to me. I don't know why it upsets me, but it does. Also, when she isn't "venting" (i.e. yelling for some reason) I feel like I'm walking on egg shells so I don't piss her off and start a fight. Also we've for the most part stopped having sex for about six months now. What should I do?


Name withheld


Dear Friend,
I do believe that your girlfriend is being quite immature and would seriously be in need of some anger management classes. If you are really concerned about her ventings, you seriously should consider getting her to see a psychiatrist to understand where this is coming from. There is more than meets the eye here and you would be better off figuring out what her triggers are rather than dealing with them going into the battlefield blind. You shouldn't have to be scared of the woman you love. It's worrying and you should ask her to see someone about this without being as blunt.

My seven-year itch...

Dear Diana,
I am in a relationship with a married man. I know this is wrong but I can't help myself when I am with him. I don't know how to let go. Sometimes, I just wanna die. I've known him since before he was married. He's six years younger and we also belong to different religions. It's been seven years now. I don't know how to cope with all this.


AB

Dear AB,
This attitude won't help you. You have to understand that he's married to someone else and that he won't break up with his wife to be with you. If he had to, he would have done it already, not waited seven years. Stop deluding yourself. It's not going to work out. The only way you can cope is by letting go.

I'm sure she cheated on me!

Dear Diana,
After a year of being together, I broke up with my girlfriend ten days ago. She cheated on me. She would message me every day till midnight. One day, she messaged to say that those messages weren't for me but for another guy. I asked her about him. She tells me he's like a brother to her. The messages tell me otherwise. I'm sure she is in love with this guy. I was true to her and still love her. What should I do?

Satish

Dear Satish,
Obviously, there's something here that's terribly amiss. No girl would get her bro-like buddy and her boyfriend's numbers mixed up unless they had the same name or similar numbers. In any case, she'd make up excuses about it, not tell you about it outright. If you're so sure she cheated on you, why do you want to get back with her? Why didn't you give her the benefit of doubt?

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