Should I take a break from relationships until I figure out where I am going wrong?
Illustration/Uday Mohite
My family and friends say that I am not ambitious enough, which bothers me because they imply that I don’t have high standards even when it comes to relationships. I am satisfied with the people I have dated and have no problems with my current boyfriend, but they seem to feel as if I could do better. I have tried explaining that this isn’t about standards, but they make me doubt myself. I don’t know if I am being unfair to my interests by being with people I choose to, but I am now starting to question my own motives because they believe so strongly that I am setting the bar too low. Should I take a break from relationships until I figure out where I am going wrong?
Your family and friends are entitled to their opinions and are probably speaking from a position of love when they want you to do better or aspire to bigger things. When it comes to relationships, however, no one is in a position to comment on whom you choose to be with except you and your partner. If you are happy, they should be happy for you because that is what unconditional love and support means. If they feel you can do better, choosing to act upon their wishes is your prerogative. It’s easy to get swayed by what the world around you has to say, but having conviction in your own ideas and beliefs sometimes takes time to develop. Think about your state of mind, how you look at this person, and why they feel as if he doesn’t meet their standards. Think about your own standards too, and measure them by your own yardstick, not by what people in your life believe you should.
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