If he gives you reasons to not accept what he says at face value, it’s a sign that your relationship isn’t as strong or healthy as you think it may be. If you trust him, you should have no problem accepting his explanation
Illustration/Uday Mohite
I am a student. I think I’m in love with a friend of mine who is currently working. She is older than me by a couple of years and we practice different religions but understand each other. I feel as if she is impressed by me and respects me even though I am a bit of an introvert in our group. I recently heard that her family is pressurising her to marry and have felt restless and worried since. What should I do? Should I ask her out to dinner? How should I know if she likes me or not? I also fear that if she rejects me, I may feel degraded among my friends and may not be able to face her.
— Sudarshan N
There is no way of knowing how she feels without you having that conversation with her. If dinner sounds intimidating, you can always ask if she’s free for a chat and try getting a sense of where things stand. If she isn’t particularly keen on a personal conversation, that is a sign too. It’s possible for someone to respect you without having any romantic feelings for you. As two adults, you should both be able to have this conversation with openness and honesty, and then accept how the other feels without it leading to awkwardness. As for being degraded by your friends in the event of her rejecting you, any friend who doesn’t respect you isn’t a friend at all.
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Should I worry about the attention my boyfriend gives another woman? He says she just needs his help, but I sometimes wonder if there’s more to it. I don’t know if I am being paranoid.
This depends upon the strength of your relationship and how much you trust your boyfriend. If he gives you reasons to not accept what he says at face value, it’s a sign that your relationship isn’t as strong or healthy as you think it may be. If you trust him, you should have no problem accepting his explanation.
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