I can’t adjust with this crowd. Please help me sort this out.
Illustration/Uday Mohite
- I can’t adjust with this crowd. Please help me sort this out.
- This was a conscious decision because I was dealing with a lot of family disputes
- What are the other ways we can find love?
I am a 26-year old freelancer who has never been in a relationship. This was a conscious decision because I was dealing with a lot of family disputes. However, now that I am looking for a long-term relationship, I find it difficult to adjust to this generation of people. Why are so many of us using dating apps and looking for something casual or meaningless these days? Why is ghosting so hurtful? I don’t even use Instagram or Facebook because it seems so unreal. People do not reveal who they really are, which makes me hesitate to use dating apps. What are the other ways we can find love? I prefer maintaining a good distance with technology and using it only when it is mandatory. I can’t adjust with this crowd. Please help me sort this out.
— PT
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Everything you are saying is valid and more universally felt that you might imagine. It’s true that technology has created a number of divides and has had an impact on how we all present ourselves to the world. Having said that, while it’s great to maintain a healthy distrust of these apps and personas created by users, it’s also important to recognise that they are the first step towards what is your human interaction with another person. You are using them as mere stepping stones before evaluating a person in real life. You can choose to meet people the tried and tested way, via introductions or at places you like to hang out, too. Society continues to grapple with issues like social isolation, and the casual relationships you mention are a symptom of that. This isn’t to say there aren’t people like you looking for something meaningful. All you have to do is give yourself an opportunity to find them, which will happen when you open yourself to possibilities.
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