You can reach out to her directly and ask her out for a cup of coffee, but you have to be prepared for her refusal because there are no signs that she wants you to pursue this
Illustration/Uday Mohite
A co-worker and I recently had a short fling, but decided to call it off because we didn’t want to complicate things at the office. It was passionate and I think we were both happy while it lasted, until we went our separate ways and decided to not be together again. I have been thinking about it over the past few weeks though, and wonder if we were too hasty and ended it without seeing if there was potential for a relationship. I believe we were good together. Should I talk to her and ask her to reconsider her decision, or does it make sense to just forget about it and move on? She doesn’t seem like she has second thoughts, but I wonder if she is just not saying anything because she thinks I am not interested. What should I do?
Nothing stops you from having that conversation and asking her a direct question, but the issue of whether this makes sense or not can only be determined by the two of you based on your dynamic at the office and what you believe can or cannot work. Think about any potential risks, what happens if this doesn’t work, and whether this can have an impact on your work, your other colleagues, or your individual superiors. Then again, if she isn’t interested, this won’t matter.
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I made some inquiries about a common friend who has begun to avoid me because she thinks I like her. I am interested in her, but have not said anything specific, and don’t know if I did something wrong by asking questions about her. How do I fix this situation so she considers giving me a chance and going out with me?
Her refusal to engage with you is a strong indication that she isn’t interested. You can reach out to her directly and ask her out for a cup of coffee, but you have to be prepared for her refusal because there are no signs that she wants you to pursue this.
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