Mumbai's main party man, Riyaaz Amlani, joins hands with top de-addiction doc, Yusuf Merchant, to get the young crowd to lift the taboo attached to mental health
Amlani says Dr Merchant's book on happiness is without jargon and about simple lessons that anyone can adopt. Pic/Datta Kumbhar
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When was the last time you were depressed?" asks Dr Yusuf Merchant. Had this been his therapy room, the answer — Monday — would have been more forthcoming. But this is The St Jude Project on Bandra's Waroda Road, the creative centre for Riyaaz Amlani's Impressario Restaurants. And unlike the privacy of a therapist's room, there's an entire audience here. Yet, that's the taboo that's under the lens today — to remove the stigma attached to mental health disorders.
"The cure is to talk about it. Get people to consult counsellors and support groups and let them know that they are not freaks," says Dr Merchant, better known in the room as Doc. Doc is the founder of one of India's primary drug rehabilitation centres — Drug Abuse Information Rehabilitation & Research Centre — and, sitting next to him is Amlani, the man he has partnered with to help get this message across. Amlani has, the duo say, access to the target audience for whom the message is meant.
"Everyone is under the pressure of living the perfect life, even when they haven't formed their own identity yet. But, this is not about millenials or Gen X. There's no age barrier to those suffering from depression. And one of my pet subjects has been to figure what role hospitality can play in making cities more liveable and loveable," says Amlani. This weekend, Dr Merchant's book, Happyness: Life Lessons From A Creative Addict, releases. But, the book also marks the beginning of the collaboration between Doc and Amlani where Social, the latter's flagship chain of restaurants, will become host to a campaign to raise awareness about mental health disorders. "Did you know that happiness is taught as a subject in some Delhi schools?
At the Delhi Social, the vice-chancellor of Delhi University will be speaking on depression while releasing the book. So, we will connect with colleges, schools and parents. A lot of times, depression, which is essentially suppressed anger, arises because of parental conditioning. There's constant pressure to meet their expectations because of which the young suffer from low self-esteem," says Dr Merchant. But there's more. "Think of how we raise our kids. When they fall or bang against a table, we hit the floor or the table and say 'bad floor' or 'bad table'. We are teaching them to find something to blame." "I do that with my kid!" says a surprised Amlani.
"See! That's why I like his book. There's no jargon. He speaks in a language that drives home the point and he has this great ability to connect with everyone." Dr Merchant, himself, has no qualms about talking about the painful periods in his own life. A childhood which he says didn't exist, battling loneliness, and resentful with no family to speak of. "My first family was the drug addicts and depressives who lived with me." But, happiness can be learnt and that's a life skill that the book aims to teach its readers. Dr Merchant's three routes to achieving happiness are: a) Overcoming obstacles. If you don't have goals you can't be happy. b) Have a good value system. Values have the test of inconvenience. The more inconvenienced you are by upholding it, the more you will enjoy it. c) Just choose to be happy.
"I don't have to be happy when I get the bungalow or the car. I can be happy on the way. Right now, I choose to be happy sitting next to this big guy." "I have been trying to lose weight," laughs Amlani. And then, he turns serious. "The value system bit applies for instance, when I want to make excuses not to hit the gym. It's delaying gratification. But having the system and sticking to it, however inconvenient, makes me happy." Getting names like Siddharth Basrur (musician, who is public about his battle with drug abuse) to talk, the two feel, will also provide youngsters with role models. Amlani says, "It'll be interesting for kids to see creative and successful people talk about how they were not always happy." Social, which Amlani says likes to build communities, will be home to support groups which people can access.
"I have witnessed firsthand how having others around can help people get out of depression and it's a process that takes time. Our communities are about things people are passionate about but I think you can have a support group that addresses an issue that we are battling as a group. You are not alone anymore." Allowing yourself to be unhappy is also okay. "Everyone's f****d up just like us. We haven't put up pictures on Facebook of us being unhappy, neither have they. It's okay to be unhappy. The world is not supposed to be hypomanic. So, slowly things will turn," Merchant explains. There's more to the plan. Impressario also plans to add a nutritional element to its menu, introducing dishes that up serotonin levels.
But, it's not something they don't want to rush into. Currently, they are busy getting the research right. Providing stress balls at some outlets, and allowing for community seating arrangements, aims to get the Social crowd more offline and engaging with the person next to them. Dr Merchant puts the critical mass here at five per cent. "Even if we reach out to them and get them talking, we have got our victory."
Also read - Mumbai food: Riyaaz Amlani's Capital Social to open in BKC
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