Libyan Libertines

Muammar Al-Gaddafi is teetering on his throne

Libyan Libertines

"The Guide of the First of September Great Revolution of the Socialist People's Libyan Arab Jamahiriya", "The Leader of the Revolution", and "The Light of Libya" is going to find it tough not flying over water en route from Tripoli to Caracas - his personal peeve (another one of many) is that he should be near ground level as much as possible.

His large eclectic wardrobes are being packed up. The ear rings and purple dresses being wrapped in eiderdown along his military jackets and safari suits. And his trunks of ribbons, medals and orders are all being placed carefully into the hold as befits such a decorated leader. (Nobody told him that the honorary doctorate from the University of Tripoli shouldn't be displayed on his chest along with his army ribbons, but then who are we mortals to advise him?)

Forget the people who have been starving and unemployed and subjugated (and in his head, in love with him).

The esteemed colonel has to have his little luxuries along so he can live in the style he's been accustomed to.

His tent, camels and personal cooks have all been sent as an advance party so when the man lands, he feels at home (at camp?). On board the personal jet is just about enough space for him, his ego, his sunglasses and perhaps a couple of sons, or so. But the question that everyone is asking is, what is going to happen to the Amazons. Long used to looking after the man and his personal whims, they're now going to be out of jobs and excitement.u00a0u00a0u00a0

Galyna Kolotnytska, his voluptuously blonde Ukrainian nurse, who ministers to all his "needs"u00a0 is used to being ferried around in a private jet. Rumours now have it that she's looking around for another sympathetic head of state who can afford her tender skills. Berlusconi was supposedly checked out, but at forty, she's around two and a half decades too old for his preferred nursing tastes. Obama, they say, briefly considered importing her to the White House, until Michelle got wind of the plan and nixed it before Obs could even learn to master "Kolotnytska."

The rest of the guards (and their splendid chests) have been contacted for things as varied as music label bands, book deals and exotic bouncer jobs at the new Arab themed resort in Vegas.

The Reddy brothers they say have also been trying to contact them as guards for their Bellary mines. But the women are still trying to wrap their heads around, "Hello, I'm Reddy. Are you ready?"u00a0u00a0u00a0

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