The discussion began after the mother of the eight-year-old boy approached MSCRC, stating that she has received a complaint from her son's school in Vile Parle about him indulging in inappropriate touching
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A Vile Parle school reprimanding an eight-year-old for allegedly indulging in inappropriate touching has set off an important debate: at what age do children know the difference between good and bad touch? Child psychology experts and the Maharashtra State Child Rights Commission (MSCRC) feel that children of this age cannot indulge in any such act knowingly.
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The discussion began after the mother of the eight-year-old boy approached MSCRC, stating that she has received a complaint from her son's school about him indulging in inappropriate touching.
'He doesn't even know'
Recalling the incident, the parent said, "They'd just told me that there were complaints against my son. After asking about the nature of the complaints, I was told that he hit his classmates and touched them inappropriately. I was shocked to hear that. It is impossible for me to believe this as he is just 8 years old. Forget about indulging in any such act, he's not even aware about bad touch yet."
The mother continued, "The [school] authorities denied my request to see the complaints. All of them present in that room were throwing questions at me like it was some courtroom and I'd committed a serious crime. More so, my son was also called in to be questioned. He was quite scared. All of this was really humiliating. I couldn't understand why we were being targeted like this".
School says
When mid-day approached the school authorities, the principal said, "He might have just been involved in a physical fight with his classmates and wouldn't have understood what he was doing amounts to bad touch, as he was hitting fellow students on their private parts. We had to inform his parents about this."
Speaking about the meeting, the principal claimed the neither the child not the parent were humiliated, "Out of the three complaints, two were from boys and one from a girl. They surely needed serious cognizance, which is why we asked the parents to come for meeting. We feel that the child needs counselling as he is currently unaware of these things and might have misunderstood certain information. Our senior teachers have been asked to keep a check on whether he is being bullied or targeted by other children or if he is sitting alone in class, etc. But nothing of that sort has come to our notice. We're looking forward to begin his counselling. But the parent seems to have taken it as a personal grudge."
Pravin Ghuge, MSCRC chairperson said, "This complaint is of a very sensitive nature and hence, has to be dealt with a much deeper approach. Both sides need to be heard, including the child, in presence of a qualified counsellor to have deeper understanding of the issue, and reach a conclusion."
'Onus lies on parents, teachers and school'
Stating that there shouldn't be any blaming or complaining in such cases, clinical psychologist Dr. Seema Hingorany said, "Though children these days are hugely exposed to the media, they are majorly unaware [of good and bad touch]. They might be re-enacting something out of curiosity or just be fighting with fellow classmates without knowing that it is considered as bad touch. Since there is no way for a child below 12-13 years of age to understand inappropriate touch, the onus lies on parents, teachers and school. This is why the education on bad touch needs to start much earlier, and dealt with more sensitively."
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