We both regret getting married!

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I am a 31-year old woman and got married a year ago to my boyfriend whom I had dated for a year-and-a half before we got engaged. I wasn't sure about this at the time but felt as if I was running out of time which is why I agreed. It has not been a happy marriage for either of us because he has come to the realisation that I am not his type. I don't know why he proposed if he felt this way, but he says he was confused and thought I was the one for him. We haven't said anything to our family or friends because we don't know how to tell them this, but living with him has been difficult because we don't even speak much. It's as if we are just forced to share a roof because of this marriage certificate. How do I get out of this scenario? I can't live the rest of my life like this. Please help.
If this isn't working out for either of you, are you both prepared to condemn yourselves to a lifetime of misery just because you don't want to inform family and friends? If it really is a marriage that has no hope, you are only prolonging your misery by refusing to accept that. Speak to your husband about what he thinks the future is going to look like and ask yourself if you feel the same way towards him as he claims to feel about you. Living in a loveless marriage isn't impossible, but you are just 31, and have the possibility of a life with someone who genuinely wants to be with you. If your husband isn't willing to take any steps to rectify this, you should speak to your family and friends for advice on what your options are. Think about the implications, evaluate what you stand to lose by staying in this relationship, and ask for help when you need it. Either way, this needs to be addressed.

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