Should we get married?

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I am a 41-year old man and have been in a long-term relationship with a 39-year old woman. We met over a decade-and-a-half ago and have been together since then. We don't want to marry, and our parents have long been okay with the idea that we are simply happy to live together. This has created some legal issues related to finance and property, but we have been able to manage quite well. I am beginning to think about marriage a lot though, and don't know if it's because I am starting to feel old. I know I am not middle-aged yet, but I am wondering if there are any benefits to being married as opposed to living together. I haven't shared this with my partner yet, and don't know if I should. What do I do?
Any relationship that is secure, strong, based on love, honesty, and mutual respect, is a relationship that works best. It's impossible to consider the pros and cons of being married versus living together, because you are already aware of the legal and financial implications. At the end of the day, the only thing that matters is the person you are with, and whether that person is someone you want to always be with. Everything else only panders to our need to categorise everything and put it into boxes. If you are both happy, you are in a successful relationship.

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How do I convince my girlfriend that I am not cheating on her? I have a habit of flirting, and she always misunderstands and thinks the worst of me. I have never cheated on her and have no intention of doing so. How do I get her to see this?
You should probably ask yourself if flirting is the problem, and why you feel the need to continue doing it. Maybe she thinks what you are doing is disrespectful to her. Why not start by discussing that with her?

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