Not sure if I really want a relationship

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I am a 52-year old woman and recently met a man four years older who asked me out to dinner. I have been divorced for a decade, and have gone on a few dates since then, but haven't had a serious relationship with anyone because I haven't found anyone interesting. This man has never been married and says he was a confirmed bachelor but has been looking for a partner because he is old and wants companionship. I really like him a lot and I know he likes me too. We have gone out a few times and there is a definite spark, as well as a mutual respect that I think is very important. I am tempted to get into a relationship with him but am also wary because I don't know if my reasons are genuine. What if I am agreeing just because I am lonely? What should I do?
You should keep going out with him until you get a better sense of who he is, as well as how you feel about him. There is nothing wrong with dating someone just because you are lonely, because your feelings matter. If there is love and respect, everything else can be worked upon. Also, you are under no obligation to commit to anything you don't want to. You are independent, free to make your decisions, and wise enough to figure out if this is right or wrong to you. In other words, you have nothing to lose, so why not keep dating him until you find your answers?

My boyfriend wants me to be nicer to his friends, but they are obnoxious and sexist people who just say the nastiest things when I am around. Should I pretend just to make him happy?
Pretending to be someone you're not may work for a short while, but ultimately fails. If someone is being nasty, they should be called out for it even if this upsets their friends. If your boyfriend can't see it, that is his problem.

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