Is it OK to go out with him?

Illustration/Uday Mohite

A friend of mine recently texted asking if I would like to meet for dinner. This was a surprise because we have known each other for a while, and I am aware that he has a girlfriend. They have been together for a few years, and I know her well, so I don't know why he wants to see me. I replied asking if his girlfriend would be joining us, but he said she wouldn't. I don't know what he wants but part of me is tempted to meet him because I have had a crush on him for a long time. Is this wrong? I don't want to feel like a criminal by meeting someone's boyfriend behind her back, but I also want to know why he has asked me out. I am justifying this by telling myself that we are all adults and that he is allowed to ask someone out if he has a valid reason. Am I wrong?
Morality is a tricky thing and fluid enough to interpret based on how we want to twist something to our benefit. Yes, it's an issue if you have to meet someone's boyfriend, but it is also perfectly normal for anyone in a relationship to meet someone for dinner. The assumption being made here is that this person is doing something he shouldn't be doing, which may not be the case at all. Putting your crush aside, it's possible that he just wants to meet for a perfectly acceptable reason. Agreeing to meet is the only way to find out what that is, after which you can take a call on whether this is right or wrong. You can also reject the invitation entirely because you are under no obligation to say yes.

How do I get my boyfriend to take the next step and ask me to marry him? We have been together for three years and there are no signs yet.
Why not broach the topic directly, given that you know each other well enough?

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