I met him, but there’s no spark!

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I recently went on a date with a guy I met online, but there was absolutely no spark between us. He was kind and polite, and we had a lot to say to each other, but it just felt like a meeting with an acquaintance. He had a great time though, and has asked me out again. I am tempted to refuse because it feels as if I will let myself down again, but I am wondering if I am not being patient enough. This has happened a few times before, and I am starting to feel as if I have too many expectations from people. Should I meet him again and just lower my expectations?
There's nothing wrong with high expectations because who doesn't want to feel something on a date? What you aren't doing is giving your dates time to get to know you better and allow their own personalities to come through. First dates can be difficult for anyone, because there is nervousness and a possible lack of confidence. It takes time for some people to be comfortable enough to let their guard down and just be themselves. If you hated the first date and don't see the possibility of ever having a conversation with this guy, you don't have to go out again. If it doesn't hurt and you feel as if he deserves a second chance, do it with the expectation that this is just a casual dinner with no predetermined outcome. Think of it as a meeting to get to know someone better, instead of assuming it has to lead to something romantic. Try and enjoy yourself and, hopefully, he will too.

My husband doesn't approve of my sibling and I often feel as if I am trapped between them. What should I do?
They are adults and should be able to sort out their own differences. Meet them together, sit them down, and tell them why this isn't good for any of you, given that you are part of the same family.

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