He posts everything on social media!

Illustration/Uday Mohite

My husband and I have different approaches to social media, which is causing some strain in our marriage. He is always posting stuff about us and my life, and I know his relatives and friends follow him, which means they know more about us than I am comfortable with. He laughs it off when I tell him not to post anything that isn't too generic. I don't have social media handles and don't believe in sharing anything about myself to strangers, which he thinks is harmless. Maybe it's because he's male and doesn't see the world from my perspective, but I can't condone it just because of his ignorance. He says I am blowing this out of proportion, while I think he is gaslighting me and making it seem as if I am being immature just because everyone we know is on Facebook or Instagram. If this continues, I have decided to separate from him just to send a strong message about how serious I am. Is this too much? Should I just accept it to save my marriage?
This isn't about your marriage alone; it's about your personal space and boundaries you have drawn for yourself. If your husband doesn't respect them, he doesn't respect you. There is nothing wrong with wanting to control what people should or shouldn't know about you, and your husband has no right to put up anything that crosses those boundaries because he doesn't own you or your personal life. A separation is a strong message though, and not one you should take lightly. This isn't to say you shouldn't do what you need to, but it's possible that he hasn't grasped why this matters to you. Tell him about your plans to separate if this goes on and give him a chance to empathise and come around to your point of view. If that doesn't work, it's obvious that he isn't willing to give you the respect you deserve. That is when you may have to take a more drastic step.

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