He is great, but I want to break up!

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I am a 27-year old woman and have been in a relationship with a guy my age for almost a year. He's a great person and I like and respect him. But, I think I want to end this relationship because I am not satisfied. When my friends ask me to explain why I am unhappy, I can't because I don't have any specific reason. It's just something I feel because I treat him more like a friend than someone I have romantic feelings for. He loves me a lot, which makes me feel guilty, but I am starting to feel like a fraud because I fake my enthusiasm whenever we go on a date. What should I do? Am I wrong to feel this way?
Why blame yourself for how you feel? You can't negate your feelings simply because your friends think it isn't the right thing to do. If you don't want to be with someone, it's your prerogative, and you don't owe your friends an explanation because they aren't the ones in this relationship. Try thinking about this on your own, looking at why you aren't happy. If you can't come up with a reason, don't be too hard on yourself. As for ending things, there will come a point when faking enthusiasm will turn into resentment, making it harder for you and unfair to your partner. I suggest you speak to him, tell him how you feel, and see if that conversation sparks a change in your feelings or helps you arrive at a resolution.

Is it okay to get into a relationship with an older woman? Are there things I need to keep in mind? What if it doesn't work out?
There are no guarantees that any relationship will work out, irrespective of how young or old your partner is. If you love and respect each other, communicate with honesty, and focus on how you feel rather than what you think should happen, things should be okay.

The inbox is now open to take your most carnal and amorous queries. Send your questions on email to lovedoc@mid-day.com