He cancels on me all the time!

Illustration/Uday Mohite

My boyfriend makes plans for dates and cancels them at the last minute. I used to be very forgiving at the start of our relationship because I know he is busy and his career makes all kinds of demands on his time, but I am starting to lose patience. We have been together for over a year, and I think he should look at where I stand and examine his priorities a little more. I always change my schedule to accommodate his needs, and don't know why he doesn't understand that this is unfair. He thinks I should be more accommodating, but I am not okay with how this is affecting our relationship. Am I being unfair?
No, you're not, because a successful relationship is about balancing the needs and expectations of both partners. If you feel as if you are doing more of the adjustments than he is, you're right to ask for a shift in priorities. There is always a power struggle in relationships that can lead to rifts or a sense of inequality that eventually leads to anger and resentment. Your boyfriend should be made aware of these risks before things get out of hand, if he is serious about wanting to be with you. I suggest you have an honest chat with him about this and ask him to make a few changes soon. If he doesn't, there may not be much hope for your future together.

Is it okay for my girlfriend to go on a date with someone her parents have asked her to? She is only doing it because they are forcing her, and because they don't approve of me. I know it's a formality, but I am concerned because I am not sure if I should be okay with this.
That depends entirely upon the nature of your relationship, how much you trust each other, and what you both hope will happen in the future. If her parents don't approve, what does she intend to do?

The inbox is now open to take your most carnal and amorous queries. Send your questions on email to lovedoc@mid-day.com