Friends say I am hard to please!

Illustration/Uday Mohite

My friends say I am incredibly difficult to please, which is why I haven't been in a relationship for years. Whenever I meet a guy, I have strict ideas about whether they are someone I should date, and I always find that they don't match my expectations. I used to laugh off these comments from my friends, but I am starting to worry that they may be right. If I pass up every guy I meet, is there something wrong with me? If I just get into a relationship to break this spell, it will feel as if I am settling for something, instead of being with someone I really want to be with. What should I do?
You should take your time and keep an open mind about what you want from a relationship. There is nothing wrong with your expectations, nor is there any compulsion to date someone just because you have to be in a relationship. After a point, however, you have to ask yourself if what you're looking for is realistic, and why the people you meet aren't close to matching this. Are you not meeting the right kind of people? Do you need to expand your circles? Are you hanging out with people who share the same interests you do? These are things to consider. You should also consider what your friends are saying, not because you have to blindly agree with them, but because there may be something they notice that you haven't. Meeting more people is also important, because you never know when you may change your mind about someone.

How do I know if a cute guy likes me just because he stares at me a lot? He has never approached me which is why I am confused.
You can approach him and start a conversation to gauge what he is like. Being cute and being interesting are two different things though, so keep that in mind.

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