Not an argumentative Indian

Illustration/ Uday Mohite

For Nathan D'Souza, dissent began with a ban. The advertising and marketing professional was working in the UAE in 2015, when he learnt that back home in Mumbai, there had been a stop on the sale of beef. Being denied something, meant wanting to do more of it. And that's how beef made its way into his biryani, although he preferred the mutton-variant more. D'Souza (name changed), doesn't remember when dissenting turned him into a serial boycotter of what he didn't approve of, from Sonu Nigam songs because the singer had voiced his opposition to the the azaan and to Bollywood actor Akshay Kumar for his relentless support to the establishment. He also recently decided not to fly IndiGo airlines after it banned standup comic Kunal Kamra from availing its services after he confronted a television channel editor for his unflinching support to the government, on board. "People talk about being environmentally and socially conscious. So, why not be politically-conscious? It means going beyond supporting a particular party and/or ideology - it's about doing what we believe is the right thing," he says.

It was with Mahatma Gandhi's Swadeshi Movement in 1918 that "boycotting" became a weapon of dissent and freedom. It continues to represent the same values today, but the battles being fought are very different. In a country where everyone considers their opinion sacred, and any kind of argument or engagement on an issue, is most likely to turn ugly, many Indians are now turning to this Gandhian tool to mark their protest. It's a silent one, and relies solely on the belief that a single person alone, can change the world.

D'souza says he is troubled by the divisiveness in the country. "It's a shame to see the educated, celebrities, police officers and sportspersons peddling the hate ideology. Bollywood has been a total letdown. I've stopped watching movies that feature actors who spread the divisive agenda. I've stopped watching Indian cricket altogether. There's no pride of association left. Maybe it [cracks] always existed, but it's now out in theopen. We now see people brandishing this ideology with unhinged impunity and no fear of the law."

Archaeologist and home chef-caterer Dr Kurush Dalal and home cook-archaeologist-writer Rhea Mitra Dalal, have enjoyed Salman Khan movies in the past, but decided to stop watching his films after he was acquitted in the 2002 hit-and-run case. Pic/ Satej Shinde

D'Souza is aware that his self-imposed ban(s) might mean nothing. "But this is my way of saying that I do not agree with what some people stand for."

Author-journalist Sudha Menon whose last book Feisty At Fifty was a guide for women to make that crucial decade count, says that it was when she turned 50 that the argumentative Indian inside her, decided to go on vacation. "I grew up in a family where tolerance, inclusion, brotherhood and humanity, was a way of life. In our home, there was no othering of people. The last two years have been extremely traumatic for me," says the 53-year-old writer.

It began with people supporting the Right wing ideology, some of them very close friends, spewing hate on social media. "It shocked me to see what they believed in, and the extent to which they would go, to defend themselves. I was also distressed that the people I thought, were kind, compassionate, secular and liberal, were anything but that," she remembers. "The negativity on social media was pulling me down."

Four months ago, she decided to block those who, according to her, were weighing heavy on her. "There is a sense of lightness now. I am no longer in a toxic zone. The older me, doesn't believe that this kind of viciousness is necessary."

Not everything is about politics, though. Sometimes, it's about a person and what s/he represents. Salman Khan, for instance. Archaeologist and home chef Dr Kurush Dalal and his chef-writer wife Rhea Mitra Dalal have enjoyed the Dabangg star's antics on television and the big screen, until he was acquitted in 2015 in the 2002 hit-and-run case that killed one and injured four. "Irrespective of him being guilty or not, he could have helped the families that were affected. We felt that one way to mark our protest was to stop watching his movies, and the products he endorses. Instead of waiting for the world to change, you change your own habits," she explains.

Today, the couple says they simply change the channel if Khan's show or ad appears on television. "We see no point in shouting about it on social media. You have to choose what you want to expend your energy on," adds Kurush. "My protest for not watching Salman films is personal."

Veteran journalist and LGBTQi activist Ashok Row Kavi says he has been a victim of abusive messages and was blocked by some as a mark of protest, because of his support to the Citizenship Amendment Act. Pic/ Atul Kamble

Independent Delhi-based photographer Ananya Biswas, once a fan-girl of the actor, chose to take a similar stand. "It's not just Salman. Joaquin Phoenix, who won the Oscar this year [Best Actor] made an emotional speech that moved me to to tears, so much so that I forgot how he had refused to take a stand during the #MeToo movement. While right now, I have mixed feelings about him, you have to keep in mind that he also perpetuated injustice. Boycotting can become strange and complicated," says Biswas.

Rhea, who once idolised celebrated British chef Marco Pierre White experienced something similar last year when he visited India. White, during a conversation with a journalist said he was unaware about #MeToo, and added that Harvey Weinstein and Mario Batali - both of whom had charges of sexual misconduct - were his "good friends". "What he said was fundamentally wrong. You can't be indifferent to something that concerns half the population. Once I see a chink in someone's armour, I can't consider his talent."

The question to be asked is whether, boycotting without engaging in healthy debate, is a solution.

"No," says media professional Sapna Sarfare. "I can differentiate between the artiste and the person. I may not like a view presented by an artiste, but I can continue to love his or her work. Yes, it does become a struggle, but I usually avoid doing something drastic."

Digital marketing professional Anusha Azees, says living in a post-truth climate, only makes it more important to engage, and have dialogue. "I haven't stopped following people because I feel everyone is entitled to an opinion. It was and still is difficult to see them openly condone violence on my timeline. It's hard because they are friends, acquaintances, former colleagues. It's scary because that means they can hate me for my identity [too]. But for me, it's also about understanding and trying to empathise with where they come from if I am to reason."

Veteran journalist and LGBTQi activist Ashok Row Kavi, who has been vociferous in his support for the Citizenship Amendment Act (CAA), says he has been getting the raw end of the deal. "It was not different when Aadhar was being discussed. Members from the hijra community said they did not want it, because biometric information would be used against them. At the time, I took it upon myself to convince them. Humsafar Trust [founded by Kavi] set up Aadhar camps everywhere. It is the duty of civil society organisations to be facilitators between the state and the marginalised," says Kavi. He, however, did not expect this alienation from friends and supporters, when he backed the CAA. "I can't argue with them, because they are simply abusive and intolerant. There doesn't seem to be any ground for discourse. They just don't want to talk about it."

Author Sudha Menon decided to voice her protest against those who condone violence on social media by blocking them

Gandhi's great-grandson and peace activist Tushar Gandhi says with vitriolic and hateful slogans like "Desh ke gaddaron ko goli maro" becoming commonplace, boycotting seems like "the ideal form of dissent" to declare your protest. "But it is more appreciable when you do this with organisations, because it will hurt their profitability. When dealing with individuals, it would seem like an intolerant gesture. There is always potential to hold your intellectual ground, because when you talk about non-violent resistance, what you are doing is attempting to elevate yourself to a higher plane, and make the other person feel that they too, are capable of rising [above intolerance and violence]."

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