She blames me for 'making' her hit me! Am shocked!

Dear Diana,

I am planning to leave my wife, but am really scared of her. The other day we were having an argument and she punched me. I was too shocked, even so she has hit me before. And she blames me for "making" her hit me. She would say sorry after an hour and promise never to hit me.

What makes this event worse is, she was gonna report me to the police for hitting her! However, I have recorded her stating she is gonna frame me if I leave her. Meanwhile, she says she loves me and all but I'm starting to think she just needs me.

I've been with her through her ill health, I've improved her confidence and made her a better person. We do have good times, but I'm currently weighing up the pros and cons of leaving her.

Name withheld

Dear Friend,

If you have had enough of an abusive realtionship, it's best to let go of it. Don't look for approval from people who have a limited understand ing of your probblems (like me). Each individual had a threshold of suffering beyond which he/she can bear nothing further. I suggest finding yourself a good lawyer and filing for divorce and seeking further legal counsel in anticipation of her moves.

Of course, you have to be sure whether you want to leave her or not. She might not realise her own strength. Give her the benefit of doubt. Also, the one who suffers at the hand of another quietly, sins almost as much as (if not more than) the perpetrator of that violence.

I hate 'em all!

Dear Diana,

I hate my parents, some of my friends and my life, in general. I argue with my folks constantly, my friends are always fighting. I hate them and I hate being me. All this makes me feel upset and I never want to go to school because of this!

Dhiraj

Dear Dhiraj,

Take time off everyone. Go for some meditation sessions by yourself. Seek answers through self-introspection what it is you hate about those around you. Try to better them or make yourself better to be in happier state of mind.

Am cheating and don't even feel guilty

Dear Diana,

I have been in a very happy relationship for the past four years. Everything seems just right. Recently though, I met another guy (a married guy) on a trip and had great fun with him!! After the trip, we began talking over the phone (my BF knows). We soon graduated to phone sex.

I am hooked now. I only think about doing this new guy. It's very addictive. We continue to have phone sex day and night. It's a weird feeling! I don't even feel guilty. Am in love with my bf as well. Am I biting off more than I can chew?

Name withheld

Dear Friend,

Cheating is cheating, by any other name. You can't have both without each being unaware of the existence of the other. And even if that means losing one of those guys, well, then so be it! Also, any addiction is bad, however harmless it may seem at first. You don't feel guilty because there's no actual physical contact. Your boyfriend won't stand for it, I can tell you that.

But it is something you have to let him know. And here's why: eventually, they will find out about each other, however much you may try to hide each from the other. It may all be hunky-dory for now, but the bubble will eventually burst.