05 August,2010 07:25 AM IST | | Dear Diana
Dear Diana,
I have a friend who has a really gorgeous boyfriend. We aren't close anymore after she created trouble between me and a mutual friend. She looks bad, is a compulsive liar and causes trouble for everyone. I really don't understand what he sees in her. I recently met him and instantly felt something and I am sure it is mutual. I am tall, thin and attractive but we have a lot in common interests. To be honest, I think they are only together because she will give him sex and has no morals or ambitions. I just can't get him out of my head. I am not the kind of girl who tempts a lad on purpose and I wouldn't get off with him while they were together. Any advice?
Name withheld
Dear Friend,
Looks to me like you are listing all the things you don't like about this girl to justify your feelings for her guy. You are obviously not the kind of a friend who steals her friend's boyfriend, and are trying to convince yourself and me that she is just-so-bad that she deserves this bad thing to happen to her. But let me tell you, if you do go after her guy, and something happens, you won't feel good about it. The guilt won't let you enjoy being with him. If he is only with her for the sex, it won't last. And if he feels a connection for you, he will come find you. For now, you can continue talking to him like a friend and if he sees how right you are for him, the rest will follow. You won't have to drive this. It will drive itself, if it is meant to be, and if there are feelings on both sides.
I have lied to him about not being a virgin....
Dear Diana,
I am 19. Problem is, every guy I know thinks I'm not a virgin. It's probably because of the friends I hang with. They once asked me if I was a virgin. I said no, because otherwise they wouldn't continue to be my friends. Now this guy I like thinks I've already had sex and wants to get intimate. Will he find out I am a virgin if I sleep with him?
ABC
Dear Friend,
A guy with experience will know if you are a virgin. You may bleed a little, be nervous and not relaxed enough. If you really plan to indulge, you want it to be special. If you really like this guy and plan on doing it with him, you should tell him you are a virgin, so he can be gentle. Virginity is something you lose once, so make it special, memorable and do it with someone you love. Tell him if you are not ready.
If I lose weight, will she be mine?
Dear Diana,
I'm a 14-year-old boy and have always had some problems with my weight. I'm not obese but have fat on my chest and my belly and around the belly too. I wanna lose weight but don't know how to. I want to lose fat because I've learned that girls reject you for being fat. There is a girl in my class I've always tried to approach but she always rejects me. She tells me we're better off as friends than as a couple and that always makes me sad. If I lose weight, do I stand a chance with her?
Ramesh
Dear Ramesh,
Do you really want to be with a girl who is only concerned with how you look? If she was really interested in you, she would have looked beyond the fat. Agree with her and just be friends with her for the time being. You should lose weight so that you will feel more confident and it is always good for your health to be your ideal weight. Once you are happy with the way you look, your confidence will naturally draw the right girl to you. Anyway, you are only 14 years old. You have your whole life ahead to find the right girl. Relax and take life as it comes.
