29 November,2010 05:55 AM IST | | Soma Das
Taking a cue from the Deepika Padukone and Imran Khan-starrer, Break Ke Baad, we find out whether couples, who choose to go on a 'break' are putting their love stories on pause instead of ending their relationship
Boy meets girl, they fall in love, but then don't live happily ever after. Issues crop up and they decide to go on a 'break' instead. Sounds familiar? Think Ross and Rachel from popular sitcom Friends. Or Prince William and Kate Middleton from real life. The couple decided to have an "amicable split" in 2007, and were back together before the year-end, and are now set to tie the knot in April 2011.
I have had break-ups, but never breaks! My character in Break Ke Baad
is similar to me in real life, since I too don't understand the concept of a '
break'.- Imran Khan
If two people are in a relationship and things aren't working out, they
should attempt to make things work. If things still don't work out, then
they should break up. There is no middle path.- Deepika Padukone
Closer home, Bollywood movie Break Ke Baad, starring Deepika Padukone and Imran Khan explores the dynamics of a couple on a 'break'.
Relationship expert Ameeta Sanghavi Shah admits that couples are now more willing to consider going on a 'break' as a solution to their relationship problems, both before and after marriage.
"There's nothing wrong with short-term breaks that can last from a fortnight to a month. The couple can pursue individual interests or even go someplace together and decide to keep their issues in 'freeze mode' during that period," says Shah.
On the plus side, both partners may realise that they were taking each other for granted or how trivial their issues were. On the flip side, they could also realise that they are better off without each other, says Shah.
But isn't it better to talk and thrash things out rather than take the escape route? "Talking things out can be dicey, especially in the middle of a fight. Issues need to be discussed with a lot of sensitivity," says Shah, who advises against playing the blame game and suggests focussing on problem-solving, instead. "A break may actually help diffuse the tension."
Setting relationship guidelines before going on a 'break' is crucial, advises Shah. "Figure out what's okay and what's not, whether the relationship will be exclusive or if the two of you can date other people. That will spare future grief," says Shah.
Actress Roshni Chopra, who married director Siddharth Anand Kumar four years ago, says that the couple is forced to be apart, given the nature of their work. "We travel all year round for our respective assignments, which means we go on short breaks that actually make us fonder of each other," she says, adding that 'breaks' may help a person realise that happiness doesn't have to revolve around the relationship.
Entrepreneur Harshad K (24), however, who has been in a relationship for the past two years, feels that a 'break' signals a soon-to-be-break-up. "The fact that the couple is on a 'break' means that there is discord. Rather than skirting around the issue, they should talk things over and decide whether to break up or give the relationship a second chance."
