'I can't take my eyes off this new girl in office...'

Dear Diana

Dear Diana,
I'm 27 and in a committed relationship. At my workplace, a new girl joined recently. She is 22 and I feel attracted to her. I find her hot. She's pretty with lovely hair. I chose to not take things further out of respect for my relationship. It's been four weeks now, but I'm still constantly thinking about this girl. I keep staring at her and wish I was sitting next to her. I now feel even stronger for her and less for my current flame. Is it love or lust? Should I go for it? Or stay put?
- Saiyam


Illustration/ Amit Bandre

Dear Saiyam,
It is obvious that it is lust. You are drawn to her because of her looks and body. You're interested in having sex. You just want to be her lover. If you keep staring at her at your workplace, she will take offence and complain that you are stalking her. More importantly, you do not even know her. What if she is already hooked? You can befriend her and get to know her first before going any further. Also, if you are already committed you have some serious answering to do to your girl.

Dear Diana,
My husband is an alcoholic and spends time with a colleague, who is also an alcoholic, and often stays with him as well. Though my son and other family members are telling me to leave him, I still find myself being drawn to him. We have been married for 19 years. I still love him. What should I do?
- Anika

Dear Anika,
It is understandable that you still have feelings for him - you have lived for almost two decades with him. Your husband needs help and counselling to overcome his addiction. If you desert him, he will hit the bottle with a vengeance. He needs to be sent to rehab. Your son may be angry by his doings, but he is his father. So, instead he needs to extend a helping hand.