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While Bernard Madoff's wife said she was embarrassed by his $50 million fraud, actor Shiney Ahuja's wife supports him despite a rape allegation. Must you stand by your man or the truth, FYI asks
This one's not an easy choice to make, like most others. Deciding whether you want to stick by the man you've loved and trusted, or standing up for what you believe is right, didn't leave any woman smiling. American Bernard Madoff's (he's involved in scam duping scores of investors) wife Ruth, says this is not the man she'd known all these years. While it takes gumption to go public against your man, what most Indian women reel under is a sense of duty towards family and kids. And then of course, there's the financial angle. Is it economically viable to go alone? Ruth used to get foil highlights every six weeks but the last time she called her Manhattan salon, she was told not to return. So, there!
Anupam, Bollywood actor Shiney Ahuja's wife rejects all allegations against her husband, who is accused of raping his domestic help. "What will you believe? Every day there are different versions of the same thing. But truth has only one version. Truth is universal and it cannot have multiple versions. The truth is that my husband is absolutely innocent," she said at a press conference, even as a DNA test report confirmed sexual assault. A few days ago, Shiney admitted it was consensual sex, not rape. Where does that leave Anupam, and her notion of being an emotional pillar for her husband?
 
Actor Shiney Ahuja and wife Anupam
Who cares about society!
Women must do what's right for them
Pretti Jain, Women's Rights Activist
A woman should take her stand depending on the nature of the mistake the man has committed. If it's of sexual nature, it is unforgivable. He has cheated on you. We live in modern times where taking the right course of action without worrying about how you'll be viewed by social eagles, is passé. Raise your voice in a public forum. It is impractical to continue the marriage or relationship when you are embarrassed by his behaviour. A man wants his woman to maintain her chastity. I don't see why a woman can't demand that the man remain faithful.
If these are reasons why you are in a relationship, GET OUT NOW!
>>You believe in traditional Indian values like keeping the family together irrespective of the catastrophic
circumstances.
>>You have been divorced before, and want make this marriage work no matter what.
>>You are suffering from problems of your own that make staying with a husband who has erred, better than being on your own. These include insecurity, depression, substance abuse, suicide attempts, history of childhood abuse, crippling anxiety and low self-worth.
>>You are holding yourself responsible for the marital disaster and striving to make it right.
>>You are older and of the opinion that there are still enough emotional, social and economic benefits to staying together.
>>You and your man have long agreed, consciously or unconsciously, to remain together, but run your lives separately.
>>Your parents and extended family are pressurising you into staying in the relationship.
Tough to let go, says urban Indian nari
Archana Puran Singh, Actor
Whether I would support Parmeet depends on the nature of the mistake he has committed. It's difficult to take a stand publicly since every marriage involves two families. I'd wait till the court passes a verdict to decide.
Suchitra Pillai, Actor
I will try and sort out the matter by delving deeper into it. Taking a drastic step could end up ruining my life. But there is no reason to forgive if a partner has committed a grave crime. Then, there is no point sticking around.
Sushma Pandit,Pre-primary teacher
It is not easy to make or break a relationship since complicated emotions are involved. I would ask my partner the reason for his behaviour and try to resolve the matter so that our relationship remains
unaffected.
Meghna Sharma, Media professional
I will forgive my partner to get back to a smooth-sailing relationship if he accepts his mistake and promises not to repeat it again.
Dr Rajan Bhonsle, Psychologist and Relationship Counsellor says before taking a drastic step, consider this:
>>Check whether your partner is truly at fault. Be his support system till he gets justice. This will make the bond strong.
>>Take your decision after the verdict is passed. You don't want to lose your man, thanks to distrust.
>>Do not part away on petty issues that can be resolved through communication. | 
